Dating After Purity Culture
“Shame doesn’t disappear when ignored; it begins to seep.”
– Matthias Roberts, Beyond Shame
Move Past Shame & Fear Into Confident Exploration
Purity culture can harm us in numerous ways. It affects how we think about our bodies, pleasure, relational dynamics, marriage/singleness, and our self-worth. It can cause us to completely avoid dating, out of fear. It can cause us to recklessly jump into promiscuity, out of rebellion. Most of all, it can cause us to feel ashamed.
I help people who have grown up in purity culture transform their love lives. Perhaps you are wrestling with your sexual ethics and are terrified of making a mistake you will regret. Perhaps you have little dating experience and feel overwhelmed when you try to engage. Perhaps you are no longer sure what you are looking for, or have simply lost hope.
You don’t have to navigate the murky waters of dating alone.
Own Your Journey
Shed the shame that can come from singleness, from sexual exploration, from missed opportunities, or from pain. Process and make sense of your dating journey. Own where you are and get clear on where you want to go.
Reclaim Your Power
It’s easy to feel powerless to make your love life “happen.” But there is a lot that you have agency over. Deepen your own wholeness to expand the possibilities of your dating world. Gain clearer vision so you recognize opportunities when they come. Learn tangible strategies for navigating tricky dating situations.
Form New Sexual Ethics
Perhaps you no longer subscribe to purity culture, but now what? Experimenting in this area can feel particularly risky. Process your fears, get clear on your values, and build practices of resilience, so you can engage in intimacy in ways that feel congruent to you.
Build Relationship Skills
Learn about your attachment style, conflict style, and communication patterns. Learn how to repair after conflict, communicate your needs, enforce boundaries, and engage in relationships from a place of self-love and wholeness rather than reactivity.
Hi, I'm Elizabeth.
I am a spiritual abuse survivor who now supports people in their journeys of healing and growth after religious trauma. I am biracial (half-Korean, half-white), grew up on the East Coast, lived in South Korea for 7 years, and now reside in Southern California. I received my Master’s of Divinity from Fuller Theological Seminary and also have training in life coaching (i.e. deep listening) and music. I integrate all of my experiences, creativity, and training into the support I offer, as relevant.
What is Working with Elizabeth Like?
Coaching with me is not about quick answers or trite solutions, we go deep. We won't just stay in the theoretical, however, we will explore tangible tools and practices to help you move forward into change and growth. I pull from the wisdom of attachment theory, positive psychology, IFS, the Enneagram, somatic healing practices, theological study, trauma theory, and faith practices in my work.
From Former Clients:
“Elizabeth made me feel seen and heard without judgment. She offered a gentle approach with thoughtful inquiry. I always look forward to my sessions with Elizabeth. She is calm, confident, and a has a wonderful sense of humor. I trust her, and can be vulnerable during our sessions.”
“I felt comfortable with Elizabeth from the first time we talked. I was drawn to working with her by her ability to emotionally connect. Elizabeth is non-judgmental, understanding, and is able to read people’s needs intuitively. I felt supported and heard during each session. “
– Jamie S.
“Elizabeth is a careful listener and insightful thinker, who, in the space of a single session, led me to several revelations about what drives me and what scares me. She challenged me to revise detrimental narratives I’ve been telling myself and helped me identify specific and achievable goals to move my life toward peace and fulfillment.”
– Lucy T.